One of our swingers, Luca, landed a 900 degree spin today. Unfortunately about a second later after he landed it, a gigantic 9 year old child smashed Luca to the side in an attempt to steal Luca's swing. Luca then flew 6 feet into a nearby fence. Luca was alright except for a few bad bruises. Technically this child was not supposed to be on the NSA's private training premises but someone obliviously left the gate open earlier today and due to the large amount of spectators on the premises he was not noticed until he knocked Luca into the fence.
Note:Watch out for these huge 9 year olds. This has happened before in other places, we have been informed by the leaders of our NSA branches in other states. Remember these 9 year olds practice no patiance. They are dangerous to everyone and must be avoided under all circumstances.